Different Day, Same Track Pants


Or, is it same day, different track pants? Hard to tell. There’s a Groundhog Day vibe to life right now.

The most exciting thing that happened yesterday was that I remembered I’d bought crumpets to go with my 14th cup of tea of the day. I’d already had a homemade double chocolate chip cookie with my morning coffee so thank goodness there’s also a dog that needs walking.

Our current daily routine does mostly revolve around food and drink so perhaps I should have bought that air fryer after all? Instead, I chose to opt into the house plant trend. (We already had the dog.) Also, face serums. Google made me.

I couldn’t be bothered with all the research, being as I’m not of the TikTok generation, and I couldn’t find my glasses to read all the blurb, so I turned to my trusted expert. The teenager was delighted to undertake an online shopping mission.

When my purchases arrived, and I did finally find my glasses, I read that my skincare products are for “tired, dull, drawn features.” A profile of me through my daughter’s eyes. A study on life in lockdown. Or middle age.

Following yesterday’s episode of the Ashley and Jacinda show I also booked a nail appointment. Thursday, 6pm at the kitchen table. The teenager saw something on TikTok she wants to try on me. I’m not usually one to get my nails done but now is the time to try new things, I guess. It’s not the weirdest thing happening in our house right now, the dog has started doing Pilates via Zoom. Between that and the extra walks he reckons life has never been so good.

There was a rainbow while we were out walking this morning. I’m sure it’s a sign. There’s a pot of gold at the end of that rainbow and Ashley Bloomfield, Siouxsie Wiles and Michael Baker are out there right now looking for it. Siouxie will be charging ahead on her unicorn with its pink mane, Michael’s there to read the map and call out important info, and Ashley, well, he’s in charge of course. I’m not exactly sure what Ashley’s job is but he’ll be saying sensible things in a reassuring voice and that’ll be enough to keep everyone on track. They’ll arrive back just in time to deliver the pot of gold to Jacinda ready for the Friday update. Hurrah.

(Like I said, there’s a weird vibe to this week.)

But that means I’ve only got a few days left to complete my remaining quests. I haven’t made any bread yet, I still need to shop the online sales, find my glasses, water the plants and wash those trackies. But first, a cup of tea.